Age, wisdom and reality!

...throwback!

Wise men agree that there are only three certainties in life. These are the certainty of suffering, the certainty of aging and the last one is the certainty of death which, whether you like it or not, exempts no one. These three realities are really connected and interwoven to each other. Human beings, as creatures, are fated to suffer because of our imperfection and some of our pains are caused of aging that we normally experience since we are subject to time and change. Then death, as an inescapable reality, comes to us in due time. All these profound matters in life became clearer in my consciousness through the help of an unforgettable and moving experience I had with the old people I met days ago.

One Sunday morning, I, together with my brothers, went to the home for the elderly (exclusively for female) which is managed by the nuns somewhere in San Pedro, Laguna. It’s just like an outreach program (but we call it as apostolate)but for me it was more of a mission, a mission to extend our helping, caring and loving hands to the aged ones and be with them. We were not there just for the sake of experience but rather our main objective isto give them joy and comfort them in their loneliness and sorrows. Aside from the diverse expectations we had in our minds, we brought also guitar for we wanted to dedicate some lovely, inspiring and joyful songs to them, knowing that most of the people, regardless of age, love to listen to music because it gives us a kind of happiness and refreshment.

It took us half an hour to reach our destination. As we made our way going down for the place is a little bit hilly and the building is located at the plain part of the land, we saw thelolas(Filipino endearment which means grandmothers) in their daily outfit patiently waiting for us. We politely approached the nun in charge and she kindly guided us to the specific area where thelolas gathered together to breathe some fresh air, to feel the warmth of the morning sunlight and to spend time with the nature. It was my first encounter with the ‘oldies’ and the moment that I was already in front of them, I suddenly felt uneasy and a little shy for I didn’t know what to do and how to talk with them. To tell you honestly, I am not a good initiator of conversation; hence, I found it difficult dealing with them. Seeing them on their wheelchairs (but some are still able to walk), I was caught up in deep compassion and sympathy towards them. Perhaps, all of us were overwhelmed by that unfamiliar scenario. Despite that, we mustered some courage to introduce ourselves and create an atmosphere where we can freely interact with each other.

Fortunately, it happened as we wished it to be. The majority of the lolas, to our surprise, were very welcoming, engaging, kind, still youthful and approachable. Thanks to Bro. Dioscoro who made our day with his wonderful talents. We sung different songs in accordance with their taste and age. We even performed Visayan songs since some of them knew the dialect. Some danced while others just observed us (especially those on the wheelchairs) but I could feel that they were entertained by us. I could clearly sense that they really wanted also to do the bogie and cha-cha (even challenging us to dance showdown) but they simply can’t due to their physical incapability. How sad, isn’t it? But still, they were smiling to us. It felt so good believing that they actually appreciated our presence.

When it was already time for their lunch, we took the initiative of assisting them in taking their meal. We learned that some of them came from far regions. Few of them speak Visayan dialect. In fact, there was this old woman who did not participate in our singing and dancing affair. Then, we knew that she could hardly speak Tagalog; thus, she opted to isolate herself on their bedroom. Nevertheless, we were able to call her attention and we learned that she came from Dumaguete. She had a good disposition and she really enjoyed our company. She talked much and shared her day to day experiences. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed another lola lying on her bed on the same room. When one of my brothers asked her roommates about her present situation, we found out that she’s already dying. She’s on her nineties. She hardly responded and just struggling on her bed. We were caught up in a deep concern on her situation. Looking into her eyes, I perceived that she’s tired and really wanted to rest. Probably, she’s just waiting on the day when the Lord calls her to His paradise and finally ends her suffering. Because of that encounter, I remember my grandmother who was very kind, thoughtful and religious. She constantly reminded us to be obedient and good all the times. I call to mind those days when I attended mass with her and after it she used to buy me cotton candy. Even on her last day, she continued to be thoughtful. She waited us until we can go home from school. When we arrived home, we saw her dying but smiling while taking a glance on us who were approaching to her. Even on her deathbed, she did not fail to utter her most familiar question: “Are you hungry?” We did not mind to reply since we were all crying, afraid of what will happen next. Reality bites, she died in the following hour. Those memories are painful since when someone you love died, it seems a part of you died also. But that’s life and we need to accept the fact that we all going to die for our life here on earth is just temporal. Hopefully, I will see again my dearest grandmother in the afterlife.

When everyone had done their lunch, we eventually bade farewell for we still have things to do in the seminary. We left home joyfully for we knew, in simple ways, we brought joys to the old people and somehow we gave them hope. We left a promise that we will visit them again after two weeks. And so we came back. In our second meeting with the lolas, we heard the news that one of them had passed away few days ago. We were not taken aback for we anticipate it to happen. In the silence of our hearts, we offered prayers for eternal repose of her soul and may she remember us...